MY LIFE CYCLE

11.20.08 ;; So today hasent been the best ,
but definetly not the worse so i guess i shouldnt complain.
Talked to 'Pocket Size' today and our conversation somehow
threw me back to my conclusion of a recent life changing experience.
I figure my life iz like a triangle. The possitive flow of the triangle movez left.
Herez a visual [: ;; maybe it can help someone else to.


...
(peace)

.(accepptance). . . . . . . . . . . . . .(discomfort).

Okay now follow me. . . .

If therez ever been one thing thatz stuck with me , itz been
the discomfort im constantly living in.
Thiz discomfort comez from me letting my emotionz and situationz
in my life overwhelm me. Panicing while waiting for thiz re-assurance
that will never be presented to me. Searching for comfort where there is none.

After enough of the struggle i find myself learning to accept matterz for what
they are. Nothing more , nothing less. Sitting back and letting life tke itz course.
I realize that thiz iz the way life should be lived. Any other way just creates
unnecessary struggle for yourself.

My conclusion of it all::
Life wouldent be ;; if there were no struggles.
There simply obstacles that evolve into stepping stones
as you build yourself up to a stronger and more dynamic person.
Thiz iz [REAL]ity.!! Accept it for what it is.
Trying to make more out of what iz not there or what you know deep down
inside will never be ;; itz only setting yourself up for disappointment.
I find ultimate comfort in the peaceful state of mind i am left with.

-N0_odle *_*

314

mmmmmm

these thingz we call emotions are currently eating me alive. thoughtz racing , stomach turning , a feeling i dont miss. it appearz that my actionz have sped up the proccess of the same situationz i was trying to pervent. as much as i dont want to just stand here and watch the time thatz supposed to be 'ourz' pass me by , seemz like it iz out of my control.

uhhmm. . . . . . well. . . . . .im about to sleep on thiz and edit a little later --> 1:33PM.

--N0_odle =/

8:53 && im back for more.

My weary mind was not able to bear these burdens ,
so i went to sleep.
Overwhelmed by the situation , engulfed ;; my thoughtz swallow me whole.
Never have I been so intrigued by one person. You've captured me emotionally ,
Physical intimacy doesent even have to be a factor , and mentally. . . . . . . .
Mentally , I lust you. What id give to be intimate w/ your every thought.
I dont want mindrape , but for our thoughts to be in tune like the perfect harmony.

-N0_odle <3

11.13.08

I change day by day. Somtimes for the better somtimes for the worse , either way I grow.
More mature today then I was yesterday. More experienced today then I was yesterday.
But intelligence , somtimes i cant tell if im gaining or loosing. These daily attempts to climb my way to greatness , a step closer. Then I step back and question if im even moving or if this is simply a figment of my imagination. Sometimes I feel like im a figment of my imagination.

Hmm , a chain of never endin thoughts that trouble my mind. =/

well. . . . . . .thatz all for now

-N0_odle

PT.1NE

ive never been so unsure of somthing im so sure of
maybe somtime further down the road ill be more
specific of what im talking about but for now i must
vent through code..
i miss my fiance.!! hope your doing well .schrody. <3
i miss the gang.!! feelz like itz been forever
mm mm mm mm mm mm mm. . . .i think i love this site.
you can put such meaningful things on here. . .and
such meaningless thingz.!! itz like the best of both worldz
at your fingertipz. . . .well. . . . . i should give this post
atleast a little significance. . . . .
sooo my fellow bloggerz. . . . . ill leave you w/ this::



Imagination is more important than knowledge. For while knowledge defines all we currently know and understand, imagination points to all we might yet discover and create.

--Albert Einstein






'until the day that i can say that 143 ;;ill cry silent tears'